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Distinctly, I remember a chilly autumn daywhen wandering along a street lined by tall trees on both sides, I, almost allof a sudden, was overwhelmed by a strong feeling of sadness and desperation. Exactlyfor what reason, I could not quite figure out at that time, and all I knew was thattears welled up in both my eyes and I struggled violently against the impulseto dial that once so familiar number and begged for his come-back. Well, anyway, I have to tell you the truthat that time I just broke up with a boy I had been planning to spend the restof my life with. It is just over totally and completely even before I realizedit. Forever, he is gone, leaving nothing but my fragmentized heart. So, at thatchilly autumn day, what did haunt me was a complex and complicated problem, aseemingly annoying problem ---what, to be exact, is love. Whenever I cannot find a satisfactoryanswer to a certain issue in the real life, it is just I who will turn to booksI have read for help. And this kind of love thinking reminds me of one of myfavorite novels---GONE WITH THE WIND ---one which can touch me and stirsomething inside me every time I read it. Of course, about this world classic,from different perspectives, different things can be said and analyzed, I,however, have decided to elaborate only according to my understanding, and thatis love. What is love? Answer varies from person toperson, and nobody,psychologists or sociologists alike, cannot give an accuratedefinition. And they, actually, have made such attempts but the result, yousee, turns out to be in vain and just not that satisfactory. So , here, I amnot planning to make any definition, quite on the contrary, I want todeconstruct a traditional understanding of love. Maybe, I just say maybe, love is only afigment in our imagination. This is what I conclude after reading this novel. Fromthe very beginning, we know Scarlett has a childish crush with Ashley and forher whole life Ashley is her dream and has uphold her through so many dark years.Yes, in her life, there is always Ashley, desolate, heart-broken, ready toscream at fate as she often is, always, there is still Ashley. This kind oflove towards Ashley has made her turn her back against many men, even Rhett whodoes love her heart and soul; this kind of love blinds her very eyes and shejust lives in her imaginary love for so many years until one day---the day atMelly’ death when Ashley chose to run away from his wife and avoid to face thecruel fact---she woke up suddenly and saddened by an acute dullness and clear realizationthat she Scarlet never loves Ashley before, and he just never really existed atall, except in her imagination. At this, she cried and at that very moment sheneeded Rhett, needed him so desperately that she just hoped to have wings tofly to his broad bosom that she had neglected for so long. That day sherealized that she only loves something she made up, something that is just asdead as Melly is. She made a pretty suit of clothes and fell in love with it.And when Ashley came riding along , so handsome ,so different, she put thatsuit on him and made him wear it whether it fitted him or not. And she wouldn’tsee what he really was. She kept on loving the pretty clothes—and not him atall. She just loved her own imaginary Ashley for so long until she found out atMelly’ death how week and coward he was, and her life-long dream was shatteredinto fragments. She looked back down the long years and sawherself in green flowered dimity, standing in the sunshine at Tara, thrilled bythe young horseman with his blond hair shining like a silver helmet. She couldsee so clearly now that he was only a childish fancy , no more important reallythan her spoiled desire for the earbobs she had coaxed out of her papa. For , onceshe owned the earbobs, they had lost their value, as everything except moneylost its value once it was hers. And he, too, would have become cheap if, inthose first far-away days, she had ever had the satisfaction of refusing tomarry him. If she had ever had him at her mercy, seen him grown passionate,jealous, sulky, pleading ,like the other boys, the wild love which hadpossessed her would have passed, blowing away as lightly as mist beforesunshine when she met a new man. At this sudden realization, Scarlet neededRhett, one who for so many years had loved her as much as a man could love awoman but she Scarlet had ignored so cruelly. But now, she really needed him,desiring to nestle besides him whispering her love to him. So, she run homequickly, actually so quickly that it brought tears to my eyes when I wasreading this part because as reader I know what is waiting for her. After solong a time, after so much hurt and negligence, Rhett’s love wore out and hehad decided to leave Scarlet and he meant it. Rhett was never one to patientlypick up broken fragments and glue them together and tell himself that themended whole was just as good as new, and what is broken is broken. I have tosay I cry over and over again at this, at the fact that a love a tough guy justlike Rhett has should end on earth! They say the minute love is spoken out ,expressedand realized, one is doomed to lose it forever for the very paradoxical andcontradictory fact that love only exists in human’s imagination. You think youlove someone so much that you can even sacrifice everything only to be togetherwith him but when you really get him, sadly ,you have to face the hard truththat the once passionate and crazy love you hold for him fades during thetime-and-effort-consuming chase and pursuit. It is so sad that it is our humannature that we always give no attention to the things we already have, instead, we spend almost all of our time imagining, desiring ,purchasing somethingthat is far out of our reach. And what is more fortunate is once we get it , wewill throw it away just immediately—this is especially true when it comes tolove. Love is something we imagine in ourimagination—we make our imaginary lover in our mind and put a pretty clothes onhim—and then start to chase after him until we really get him. On this journeywe ignore those who really care us and love us and only are so obsessed withour stubborn love that we even forget to stop to see clearly what we arepurchasing really is. Years later, regretfully, it occurs to us that we have deceivedourselves using our own imagination. Maybe, beauty, as a good many persons put,only exists within a certain distance, so does love. The scene Scarlett run home, her love forRhett with her and after so many years she suddenly realized that it Rhett thatshe Scarlett really loved touches a raw nerve and tears roll down from mycheeks. On that chilly autumn day, strolling along a street , stroked andstifled by a sudden desolation ,I began to think about what is love. Parhaps, just as is illustrated in GONE WITH THE WIND, love is only afigment in our imagination, but still, still I cherish a sincere hope that oneday I will encounter my soul-mate.
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